I really used to love air travel. As a kid, I thrilled to the powering up of the engines, followed by massive acceleration leading to take off. I didn't even mind the turbulence, finding it to be more like an amusement park ride than something to be worried about. Landings? Loved the touching down of the wheels and accompanying "Thank God for seatbelts" slowdown.

Fast forward a number of years to an unbelievably turbulent flight which lead to several injuries, including bloodied and battered flight attendants, several concussed passengers, and a plane cabin strewn with food, drinks, and personal belongings. Add to that a crash landing, and you can see how my attitude toward the joys of flying has changed. A lot.

When forced to fly now, it's a bit more white-knuckled. I take my prescription (to slow my heart rate to that of an over-caffeinated hummingbird), take deep breaths, pay attention to the safety demo, and read the pamphlet regarding exits and water landings. As a matter of fact, I read everything in the pouch on the seatback in front of me.

In all my airline-based reading, I've never seen some of these unusual rules and regs in use by several airlines, but thanks to Rick Seaney at Fox News, I'm ignorant (at least on this one topic) no longer.

Some examples:

Virgin America's clothing rule. The San Francisco-based carrier has a pretty lenient dress code, but it does have some standards, since it refuses to transport any passenger "who is not wearing both top and bottom apparel." Alaska Airlines has a similar rule but gets into a little more detail, explaining that "the midriff may be uncovered." By the way, most airlines also say no to bare feet.

I would think that wearing both top and bottom apparel wouldn't be much of a problem, but that rule had to have been put into play for a reason.

Here's one I have absolutely no problem with:

Ever had a stinky seatmate? There's a rule about that at American, which states the carrier can refuse to transport a passenger (and pull him/her off the plane) if the individual "has an offensive odor." If that sounds farfetched, keep in mind that an Air Canada Jazz passenger was booted from his flight in 2010 due to what fellow flyers described as a case of "brutal" body odor.

If Canadians, a people used to the fragrance of sweat-soaked hockey gear were complaining, it had to be BAD.

Let's go out on a weird one:

Delta Airlines "Clean Antlers" rule. If you want to bring a rack of antlers on your next Delta flight, no problem. Just make sure they’re not dirty. Delta says antlers "must be as free of residue as possible," plus you have to wrap up the skull and protect the tips. After all that, you also have to shell out the $150 antler transport fee.

If I had a nickel for every time I've been stuck sitting next to an Elmer Fudd clone who's holding residue covered antlers in his lap...

Michael Hall/Photonica/Getty Images
Michael Hall/Photonica/Getty Images

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