The Most Stolen Items From Illinois And Wisconsin Restaurants

I'm not saying that I've ever stolen anything from a restaurant. I'm merely suggesting that if you're ever in my kitchen and decide to conduct a logo inspection in my cabinets, I don't have a proper alibi.

That's why I was fascinated by a recent piece from Mashed.com titled “7 Of The Most Stolen Items From Restaurants.” And while this is a national list, let's be honest about our own Midwestern thievery. There's absolutely no reason to believe Illinois and Wisconsin diners are somehow immune to the temptation of walking out of a restaurant with something that doesn't belong to them.

In fact, I'm willing to bet that if you took a close look around the average Northern Illinois or southern Wisconsin kitchen, you'd find some evidence.

A person sitting at a table with a glass of wine

So, What Exactly Are Sticky-Fingered Diners Swiping From Restaurants?

According to Mashed, the things most likely to mysteriously disappear include lamps, napkins and napkin holders, candles, wine glasses, steak knives, espresso spoons and novelty items.

You have to admit that some of those make perfect sense.

A really nice steak knife? I can see the temptation. A cool little espresso spoon? Sure. A distinctive cocktail glass with the restaurant's logo on it? Suddenly you're thinking, “This would look great at home.”

But lamps? Yes. Lamps.

Mashed reports that some restaurants have actually had customers walk off with outdoor lamps. One restaurant has even had people remove them from the exterior of the building.

macro photography of clear light bulb

Seriously, If Things Aren't Nailed Down, Someone Will Try To Steal Them

And then there's the category of “novelty items,” which can apparently include artwork, unusual glassware and even taxidermy. One Indianapolis restaurant once had a mounted fox named Winston stolen right off the wall. The good news is that Winston was eventually returned.

The really weird news is that someone sent him back in an Uber.

So, Illinois and Wisconsin, consider this your warning. The next time you find yourself thinking, “Wow, that's a really nice steak knife,” remember that somebody is watching.

Probably. Maybe.

And if anybody asks where that restaurant-branded coffee mug in your cabinet came from?

You didn't get it from me.