Ever since Scot nominated me for The American Mustache Institute's Mustached American of the Year Award, we've been having a lot of fun with (not just mine, but others as well) mustaches.

We've found that everyone has an opinion on them. The correct opinions celebrate and honor them, the incorrect opinions, well...not so much. Luckily, the one person who has veto power over my mustache, my wife Amy, loves mine. So much in fact, that I've been asked to never, ever shave it off again.

Part of the fun has been learning new things about the mustache. Such as, I never knew there were so many slang terms.

There are numerous slang terms for the mustache. Most reflect its tendency to retain food and drink or its association with sex.

  • Bristle batons
  • Bro-stache
  • Cookie duster
  • Crumb catcher
  • Face-lace
  • Grass grin
  • Lip shadow
  • Manometer
  • Mouthbrow
  • Moz
  • Mr. Tickles
  • Tea strainer
  • Upper lipholstery
I'm sorry, but if I hear someone call their mustache "Mr. Tickles," I'm gonna lead the charge to hold them down and shave it off.
More fun facts:
  • The average man with a mustache touches it 760 times a day.
  • Policemen in large Indian cities are sometimes paid a bonus if they grow one, considered a symbol of virility and power.
  • Burt Reynolds’s iconic moustache has nearly 4,000 Facebook fans.
  • Mustache hair grows faster than any other body hair. It sprouts more in spring and summer than in autumn and winter.
  • In a 2008 poll from the British newspaper The Guardian, 61 percent of respondents found the mustache to be gentlemanly and sophisticated, while 39 percent believed it was worn only by fools and fiends.
  • A mustache is capable of absorbing 20 percent of its own weight in liquid.
  • Ninety percent of men shave once a day. Shaving uses up a total of five months of a man’s life if he starts at the age of 14.
Finally, you simply cannot talk mustaches without including the great Nick Offerman:
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