When you have to go somewhere but you really wish you'd just die before you arrived.

That's what this knucklehead must've been thinking in Chicago when he was videotaped taking a ride OUTSIDE a train on the red line a couple of days ago.

The man in the video (and safely inside the train), Saad Ibrahim, told DNA Info:

'When I realized he wasn’t falling off or squished by a wall or something I took out my phone and took the video,' Ibrahim said. 'He had no fear on his face. I think he was just a kid trying to do stupid s--- with his friends.'"

That's good. You don't want to see fear in someone's face when they're hanging for dear life while on the outside of a speeding train. What you really want to see is confidence, fun. You know, the face of a good time guy.

Chicago Police say they have no record of the train riding goof but "always recommend riding inside the train" says DNA Info. When it comes to train riding recommendations, truer words have never been spoken.