Chicago Man Pokes Holes In Darwin’s Theory

We obviously don't wish any harm to this person. 

HOWEVER, if nature takes its course and he dies, we won't feel too bad.

Not a ton to add here folks. This guy was seen paddleboarding down the Chicago River yesterday, navigating his way through the broken ice.

Has he seen Titanic? People die in that kind of stuff. I'm sure that tux looks good but how's the insulation? I'm guessing not great.

Congrats man. If you were looking to get a little famous in February you did it. I'm sure Chicago's first responders were thrilled at the stunt.